Healing Update:

My perineal incision still isn’t healed. There are a couple of open areas that continue to drain. My abdominal incision is looking good. My stoma continues to do it’s own thing, where it will sometimes prolapse and sometimes retract. That’s the update.

Words That Matter

I was at my 4 month follow up visit for my most recent ostomy revision and jpouch removal surgery, when my surgeon said something that really resonated with me. Another team member at the appointment suggested that if I “backed off” on the activities I was doing, that my perineal incision may heal more quickly. My surgeon immediately responded, “that’s not worth it.”

It took me a minute to process his response, but from his statement, I took away that he understands how important being physically active is for my physical AND mental well-being. He understands that I gave up a lot to wait a full 12 weeks after surgery before returning to any semblance of “normal” activity. And that I have given up a lot every time I have surgery. He also understands that if my wound was going to heal on the typical timeline, that it already would have done so. Instead, it will heal on its own timeline.

I really appreciated him for saying those words. What he said really mattered. It has taken a lot of self control to allow my body the time it’s needed to heal. And the delayed healing is not my fault. There should be no blame, when I did everything I was supposed to do. In fact, exercise reduces inflammation and promotes healing.

My surgeon also understands my history and my future. Despite his best efforts and repeat operations, my stoma still operates in its own hyper-mobile world. Which means I may have to keep having these surgeries for the rest of my life. So what’ the point of giving up the time I do have. It’s more important to enjoy my body and my ability to recreate in the way I like, when I can.

Those words helped me to overcome some fears I’ve had about my recovery by giving me the freedom to return to the activities I enjoy. I’m back to paddle boarding, hiking, and backpacking. I went on my first walk/jog the other day with hopes of returning to ultra running some day. And I’m putting in the work right now to prepare for ski season. As long as my body is feeling good and my wound continues to heal at its own slow place, there’s no point in slowing down my activity. My surgeon cleared me to continue doing what I love to do and pushing myself physically (as long as I self-monitor), so I’m going to do just that.